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Love and Feelings

Posted by C Shell 
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Love and Feelings
September 19, 2009 04:12PM
"Christian love, either towards God or towards man, is an affair of the will.... He will give us feelings of love if He pleases. We cannot create them for ourselves, and we must not demand them as a right. But the great thing to remember is that, though our feelings come and go, His love for us does not. It is not wearied by our sins, or our indifference; and therefore, it is quite relentless in its determination that we shall be cured of those sins, at whatever cost to us, at whatever cost to Him." C.S. Lewis

My feelings are sometimes tricky and unreliable. Some days, whether because of indigestion, lack of sunlight, hormonal shifts or who knows what else, I don't feel any love for my husband. I can try to create some by thinking of his wonderful character, but even that may not work. This has nothing to do with the fact that I DO love him, and I WILL love him. The gushy warm upsurge of feelings isn't the love.

I don't always feel warm upsurges of feelings toward God, or from God to me. I hate to admit it, but I'm feelings-challenged. I used to be really upset about that; was sure I was defective or sin-riddled. When I was part of a church, I compared my insides (no upsurges) to everyone else's outsides (PRAISE Jesus! I love you Lord! *hands in the air*) and came up lacking. What have they got that I ain't got, why don't I got it, and how can I get it?

Lewis says that God will give me feelings of love if he pleases. Oh, so feelings are gifts from him, not something I have to muster up? That definitely takes the pressure off. Maybe I can relax in HIS relentless love, keep asking Him to show me more, but not get my shorts in a knot about whether I "feel" anything today? Quit taking my temperature every 5 minutes?

Because it's all about his relentless, determined, unwearied love, isn't it?
Re: Love and Feelings
September 22, 2009 09:54AM
Quote
CShell
I don't always feel warm upsurges of feelings toward God, or from God to me. I hate to admit it, but I'm feelings-challenged. I used to be really upset about that; was sure I was defective or sin-riddled. When I was part of a church, I compared my insides (no upsurges) to everyone else's outsides (PRAISE Jesus! I love you Lord! *hands in the air*) and came up lacking. What have they got that I ain't got, why don't I got it, and how can I get it?

O wow, I SOOOOO relate to that. My church club was a "Fake it 'til ya make it".... in fact one day the senior pastor reprimanded me because I wasn't trying hard enough to be full-of-life, happy, joyful, and exuberant... only now am I realising that that attitude was helping me spiral into depression, because I could not see it for the poison it was, and instead measured myself in his eyes, coming up severely lacking, and unable to change.Crazy

Every day people are straying away from the church and going back to God.
- Lenny Bruce
Re: Love and Feelings
September 22, 2009 02:09PM
Yeah, i love the feeling stuff . and its one of my areas of intimacy with God . but i also know it is not everything . Him being here and us being in community together regardless of how i feel is .

Thanks

((((((((((((((C Shell by the C Shore)))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Hope you all are well .



Re: Love and Feelings
November 15, 2009 11:44PM
Yesterday, 2 Baptist ladies came to the door. I accepted their pamphlet...and they moved on to my neighbor across the hall.
10min later when I was heading out, they were still chatting with my neighbor. I thought he had some good points, so I joined in. Anyway....40 minutes later... I was amazed at their tenacity concerning the importance of the box and of their belief that they do the door-to-door thing because they love God - not under compulsion.
"Okay. Don't believe you, but I believe that YOU believe it." (no, I didn't actually say that)
I thought we made a bit of a connection, but we were at a stale-mate, so we said good-bye.
I thought it went pretty well -- at least for me. I didn't get mad at them, and I didn't fall into condemnation. I felt bad that they couldn't SEE, but then... when I was in their place, neither could I.
So, 4 hours later, I had these unexpected feelings of wishing harm upon them.
Whoa!! Where did THAT come from?
I really had to examine my heart. And you know what I came to? Those "violent" feelings were NOT mine. I believe they were planted by the enemy. I could have fostered them and watered them and nurtured a grudge, but I did't want to.
So, I told God to show me any place in my heart that wished ill toward them and I didn't "own" those feelings.
There was frustration while talking with them, but I really felt like I could have had lunch with them and been okay. I liked them -- heck, I wanted them to SEE for their own sake, so I actually was LOVING them.

My point in all of this -- Own your feelings (or lack of themwinking smiley), but know your heart well enough to see when the feelings are really YOURS and when the enemy is playing tricks on you. (Hey!!! Here's a thought -- Maybe sometimes the "lack of feelings" is the trick!!)

Onyx, I can SO relate to "Fake it 'til ya make it". That was my MANTRA, right along with "Do the right thing and feelings will follow".

(man!! Why can't I write anything SHORT?)
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